Thursday, December 30, 2010

When i was in Australia, struggling on a student budget, watching movies and eating ice-cream on waffles was a luxury. Once a month, Tuesday was Waffle or Movie night, on special weeks, we indulge in both! Gelare waffles go at $2 every Tuesday (UP $4) and tickets were $9 (UP$13).

The simple pleasures in life makes me excited.

After all,
I will start the year with an award winning absolutely inspiring based on an extraordinary true story (and i just said all of that in one breath).



2011 brings plenty of American horror movies, namely alien invasions. There's even Cowboys VS Aliens (that's something new, with Iron Man's director and Steven Speilberg helming it). But naaah, such plots are stale. I am still a sucker for movies about infection, quarantine and zombies though.

To get my dose of dark plots, i have my eye on this.



Then of course the pre/sequels that once you start, you can't stop. 2011 has plenty! X-men: First Class, Transformers:Dark of the Moon, The Hobbits, Rise of the Apes, Kungfu Panda 2 and not forgetting Harry Potter.



And finally, romantic comedies with a stellar cast that never fail to make you feel good and be hopeful in love again.

Music Represents Our Soul.

DJ Earworm was a genius in creating USA's top 25 billboard hits to commemorate 2009.

2009 was a year of recession, with the economic downturn. Co-incidentally or not, i thought this mash-up symbolises hope.

And to end 2010, here is this year's report card.

The good times are here, party on!

Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Tribute to the Hardcore Bengs

When I lived in Australia, I worked in a Chinese Restaurant. For a long while, I never figured out what B.Y.O imprinted on the glass stands for.

Somehow, I just kept thinking of body odour. Afterall, BO stands for body odour. But it doesn’t sit right. Sure, a Chinese restaurant is full of smells, but certainly it wouldn’t greet its customers with body odour printed at its entrance!

Then it dawned upon me that it stood for Bring Your Own (wine/ alcohol) and the restaurant charges a cockage fee. You hardly see B.Y.O used in Singapore, that’s when licensed restaurants can charge you an exorbitant price for some merry making.

Then, back in my Secondary school days. My crush always joked about going to Hougang chalet. The navie girl I was, I was enthusiastic and said “Let’s go! What are we waiting for?” And everyone will laugh at me, or with me I couldn’t quite figure. I just kept waiting for the Hougang chalet outing to happen.

Little did I know that Hougang chalet stands for IMH, the Institute of Mental Health situated in you guessed it, Hougang. Saying you want to take someone to Hougang chalet suggests she is loony. Ouch! My crush (although he doesn’t know that I had a thing for him) wanted to send me to the crazy house. Oh well, I did fall for a Beng.

So if you’ve always wondered what some acronyms meant during those teenage years when it was used on you, or you’ve passed that age and need to be updated or simply doing a revision on the local slang, read on and add on!

The Ah Bengs started the hokkien terms, and then the netizens cleverly sophisticated lingos with acronyms.

Because you are not studying in the medical school, neither working in a clinic, mentioning vagina or penis in public is just impolite, rude, shameful (whatever). Here’re alternatives to choose from and feign sophistication.

Vagina
1. Abalone
2. Cheese pie
3. Camel Toe (like this picture)
Breasts
1. DNB : Dua Neh Bu (hokkien) = Big Bosom Woman

2. DNN : Dua Neh Neh (hokkien) = Big Bosom

3. Raisin : Nipple

And then for the hum ji (cowards) who want to insult someone but fear their wrath, can use these insults that sound harmless enough. The receiver won’t know what just hit him unless he is just as well-versed in the underworld language as you.
1. ASK : Ah Sia Kia (hokkien) = Rich Kid. This might be a neutral term, but I find that if this is used, it is usually said with disdain that the person is born with a silver spoon in the mouth.

2. Ah Kun : An imaginary friend.

Origin : In the MediaCorp TV Series, Metamorphosis 破茧而出, a character Jin Yong Jian suffers from split personality disorder. Yong Jian refers to his split personality as Ah Kun.

3. ASW : Attention Seeking Whore

4. ATB : Ah Tiong Bu (possibly racist) = China Woman

5. Transformer: transsexual

6. BBM : Broke Back Mountain= homosexuals

7. Beethoven : 背多分 (chinese) = Back scores more points = The back view (of a person) is more attractive than the front. (Nothing to do with the musician in any way)

8. Cannon Fairy : (chinese, Cannon = 大炮, Fairy = 仙) = Someone who is full of hot air, talks big with no substance.
9. Robert : A person who 1) overpays for something, 2) pays for something not worthwhile, 3) pays for something he's not expected to.

Origin : Comes from the chinese/hokkien saying "砍菜头".

菜头 = Radish = 萝卜

萝卜 sounds like "Robert"

Just in case you want to skive, but afraid to be found out. I.E sending an email/ MSN to your working friend because you’re too stingy to SMS yet cautious about your boss checking your emails and history at the back-end, you use:

1. AJZM : Ai Jiat Zua Mai (hokkien) = Want to eat snake? (literally) = Want to skive?
Or if you want to get it on, but you’re just to shy to say the word SEX. You can use:

1. ASGM : Ai Sio Gan Mai (hokkien) = Want to have sex?

But you are not embarrassed to make the sound of sex.

2. APPM : Ai Piak Piak Mai (hokkien)

You know how sometimes when you’re out with your friends and they are unaware that their zip is open or that their butt crack is showing? You can’t possibly shout across the room and embarrass that friend right? So you try:

1. BCC : Better Cover Car-chng
Then again, it could also mean to cover your ass, wipe your tracks.

The famous ones:

1. BHB : Buay Hiao Bai (hokkien) = Do not know what ugliness is = Feels no shame or embarrassment.
We used this ALOT in Secondary School.

2. BTSS : Bian Tai Shu Shu (chinese) = Perverted uncle.
3. Self-Pwn : To kill/humiliate yourself, to punch yourself in the face.

When you want to speak and spell like a Baby:

1. Buwee: Bully

2. Dip Dip : Deep Deep = Very much, a lot, deeply. Frequently used together with "Lub" (love). Eg. I lub chiu dip dip.

3. Fish Seller: Selfish

4. Perbird : Pervert

5. Pew Pew Pew : Sound of laser weapons firing.

6. Prawn : Porn

7. Smelly : Smiley ( I am really not insulting you, just showing some love…)

When you want to bypass the forum’s censor system:

1. Bus3rd : bastard

2. Sofa King : A creative way of writing "So F**king".

Very similar, DO NOT MIX UP.

1. BRB : We’ve always known this as Be Right Back. But it could also mean Bath Room Break. This is what it means predominantly in forums where pictures of sexually appealing girls or boys are posted.

2. CMI: Cannot Make It. Usually means that someone is very ugly or has bad fashion sense.

3. CIM: Come in Mouth (used in a sexual context)

Then there are the ones that make absolutely NO SENSE.

1. Claypot : Opposite of jackpot

4. Climb : Climb Bukit Timah Hill

5. Horse : 马 = 码 = Code = Mosaic. Relates to pornographic materials.

6. LPPL : Lan Pah Pah Lan (hokkien) = Caught in both directions = Bang balls

7. NPNT: No Pic No Talk

8. NMP3NT : No MP3 No Talk

Ok, no picture no talk, I can understand. But MP3????!!?

That’s not the end.

9. NPHTT : No Picture/Proof How To Talk

10. NPJTT : No Picture/Proof Just Talk Talk
11. KC Trap : Kum Cheng Trap = Feelings Trap.

Refers to a situation where a man falls for a woman (typically a prostitute), and pays dearly for it (monetarily and emotionally).

And don’t be ignorant and think these are brands:

1. HMV : Home Made Video

2. PDF : Paedophile

And the real long mouthfuls:

1. MKLGHLG : Mai Ka Li Gong Hor Li Gian (hokkien) = Don't want to tell you, let you yearn for it

2. MKLTWS : Meng Kia, Long Tio Wu Siah (hokkien) = Literally "Don't be scared, if hit got sound". Use to tell someone to do things boldly.

Origin : Probably originated from the army, when a tonner driver is carefully reversing his vehicle and people sitting at the back will shout out the phrase to get the driver to reverse boldly.

3. NBNBNLM : No Boobies No Beauty Nobody Love Me (usually used by females)

4. NMNHNLM : No Money No Honey Nobody Love Me (usually used by males)

And finally the ones used in Army:

1. MYOB : Mind Your Own Business
2. NATO : No Action Talk Only
5. MIA: Missing in Action
6. AWOL: Action Without Official Leave

Parents, you can never know everything.

Parents-to-be, now you know something.

Compiled with help from hardwarezone.com

Tuesday, December 28, 2010

Debit cards are quite similar to credit cards, apart from the fact that these cards do not use crediting; instead it makes use of the funds within the bank account for buying anything straightforwardly. Unlike credit cards, debit cards are limited to the money enclosed in an account and does not permit you to owe anything from the bank.

Here’s how the debit card works. When you submit an application for a debit card account, you are requested to deposit a definite minimum amount, in favor of, that bank account. It moreover requires having an outstanding balance to facilitate permanent operation. This is the exquisiteness of debit cards that it does not promote debts, earning and loading up on your way. For people who are awful payers, these cards are very well suggested so as to protect themselves from the load of ocean-deep debts. To make out which card is the finest, you should think about the services it puts forward.

The major reason to prefer Visa Debit Card is its handiness, which is offered. With more then 29 million options you can seldom come across a place where you can not make use of debit cards. You can obtain cash out of ATMs all over the world. Visa not only offers a Debit card that is pre-paid, but you can also acquire a Visa Debit card that is connected to your bank account and comes directly out of that account.
The MasterCard debit card is also acknowledged at more than 28 million places worldwide, wherever the MasterCard sign is acknowledged, there you can make use of your card to make acquisitions online, over the phone or at the time of deal.

The Debit MasterCard was first initiated in Australia by Westpac in 2006 The Western Pacific Banking Corporation, as well famous as Westpac is a single of Australia’s very important banks. With a Westpac debit card you have a trouble-free access to your money in Australia or abroad wherever MasterCard is received.

The CommSec Debit Card allows you to disburse for products and services all over the world, from your individual money in the CommSec Cash Account. You can make use of CommSec Debit MasterCard for fee-free cash extractions and balance inquiries at any Commonwealth Bank ATM in Australia.

However, to review different debit cards presently available in Australia, one should definitely explore various comparison tables. For more info visit www.DebitCard.com.au

Monday, December 27, 2010

忘情水

The sponsored trip on board Legend of the Seas couldn’t have come at a better timing. When I was in the midst of emotional turmoil, it was the perfect getaway.
Being on board, it certainly gave me plenty of time to sort out my thoughts in solace.  
Each day starts with a wide spread breakfast looking out into the ocean.
After filling up with a hearty breakfast, I would usually bring a cup of hot tea to the deck and enjoy dawn breaking. Then you marvel at how beautiful life is and you forget about everything else.

Other than these quiet luxurious moments you can have on board, there is the excitement of docking in a different destination every day. This proves to be very good distraction, otherwise I will drown in my own sorrowful 忘情水.

Legend of the Seas docks at Port Klang, Malaysia first. Day tours can be signed up on board at a fee. There is a wide variety to choose from, whether you’re a shopaholic or a cultural buff, there is a tour for everyone. Estelle and me being pretty familiar with Kuala Lumpur signed up for the Free &Easy shopping tour. The coach essentially dropped us at 2 hot spots. Petaling Jaya, Chinatown where all fake Gucci, Prada and LVS reside and Lot 10 in Bukit Bintang. Girls, you HAVE to go to Lot 10. Clothes are so ridiculously cheap, I saw signs hawking RM 35 for sets (top PLUS bottom). They look like Korean designs. However, you can’t try them so I didn’t buy. I am fussy just like that about fits and cut.
The highlight for everyone would be of course when we reach our final and furthest destination, Phuket!
We had to take a boat to the shore from our ship and somehow this reminds me of a Titanic situation where we have to disembark in the middle of the waters! Pardon me, I do like to have a wild imagination.

Walking on the plank way towards shore, the KPO friendly Thai passer-bys come to check out pretty girls welcome visitors.
 Picking the Phang Nga Bay tour, we visit the Suwan Khuha Temple, a temple in the oldest cave around.


Best not to drown your sorrows in alcohol. No whisky, but vodka can?

The highlight of this tour for me is visiting Koh Panyi, a water village where more than 200 houses were built on stilts with attached wooden walkways. About 2,000 people live in this village, on water, in the middle of nowhere!
The village has its own school because it would be too tedious to ferry some 200 kids out to shore everyday.
 Can't imagine all these is on water, in the middle of nowhere.
Do you think us Singaporeans would be able to live in such a place? We can’t even survive an MRT ride without touching our iphones.
But of course, how could we miss the much acclaimed James Bond Island where The Man with the Golden Gun was filmed at. Frankly, it was just boulders. Can give this a miss if you're going to Phuket on your own. 
Being on board Legends of the Seas really healed my soul and lifted my spirits.
Sea Food is Soul Food.

Sunday, December 26, 2010

Review: Allure Beauty Salon

I’ll soon cover reviews of facials all over Singapore! Haha.

Today I shall share my review about Allure Beauty Saloon that is found in the East. Be sure that you take the mall’s lift in Tiong Bahru Plaza to reach the saloon because you can’t find it by escalators!

When I heard that Allure uses only Atache’s products, I was ecstatic. Atache, which hails from Spain (atas leh!) and it’s a blend made from research and investigation of active ingredients originating from European and American medicinal plants. I sampled Atache skincare after my trial at Glow Couture so I was quite happy to have them on my skin again.

Allure assessed my skin and deciding that I need help to lighten scar marks as well as bring out radiance for the holiday season, with an astounding nod, they prescribed C Vital.

You know how mothers tell you to take lots of Vitamin C? So C Vital is created to fight oxidation of skin. Our skin gets free radicals from pollution, light and even doing sports (which I do regularly).

So I settled in for the usual cleansing, scrub and extraction. I was happy to see my face not red and scar free after! I had to specifically tell the therapist, be gentle, be gentle. Not that she isn’t, I was just kiasu. It’s like going into the hair salon and telling them you want to trim only, but they take a huge chunk. I always thought “wassup with that!”

The awesome part comes with the face and shoulder massage. I cannot get enough of it! And something I’ve never experienced before at any other facials, the COLD BALL treatment. Slathered with serum, a cold ball is rolled all over your face to sooth and minimize pores.

I felt like Cleopatra.
Allure Beauty Salon
Tiong Bahru Plaza

302 Tiong Bahru Road, #05-04A
Telephone: 6270 8845
Email : allurebeautysaloon@yahoo.com

Thursday, December 23, 2010

After reading The Game (how do boys get girls), Neil Strauss was my newest favourite author. I had been eyeing his graphic novel How to Make Money Like a Porn Star for a while now, but it was only available online (expensive delivery!). On my birthday, my friend offered to buy it for me. There we were, ordering it online. As we checked out, “Sinner Takes All” popped up as a recommended book because of our choice. My friend’s eyes immediately brightened up and said “Hey! That’s my favourite actress!”
So we bought 2 books and saved on delivery for 2.

When it arrived, I fumbled with a book cover looking like that. My parents will soon start questioning what I am doing with a book like that. My father already leaves newspaper articles like “Singaporean Porn Actress Murdered” on my study table. I wasn’t sure then if he is hinting about the SINGAPROEAN murdered or that a PORN ACTRESS murdered or that the suspected killer is her ANG MOH BOYFRIEND.

So I took off the cover and kept it neatly away. After all, I am supposed to return this book to her fan (my friend) when I am done. Also, KPO(s) on the MRT are sure to look over my shoulder, curious what a book with that cover is all about. Removing the cover, underneath, it’s a very innocent smart looking hard cover book. My friends who saw me clutching it thought I was reading an encyclopedia!
Tera, an exotic gorgeous Thai-American grew up with an abusive mother. After her parents separated, she was scouted and transported to Japan as a model. She made it big, but soon it all spiraled when she got involved with booze and drugs. Her virginity was taken away by force, and that started her unsustainable appetite for sex. She stresses however, that it was her choice and that she wasn’t forced into it by any other unfortunate circumstances. Jenna Jameson, another famous porn star I hear, went into porn because she was gang raped by her boyfriend and his friends.

Tera is very generous with her book. She included plenty of full colour naked self portraits of herself. It’s like reading a porn magazine, except you’re more intelligent…it’s an auto biography, Dad!



Her DD(s) are real.
This book is amazing. It’s the next best thing to Harry Potter. I haven’t found another book that I couldn’t put down after Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. 287 pages of text, I absorbed every single word. From the foreword to the acknowledgements, I read every single word.

Tera was a woman so tainted and spoilt, been through dozens of men as a porn star that she starts wondering if she will ever find a man who would love her as she is. Ultimately, she is a traditional girl at heart and do want to marry and settle down. Having sex means paying the bills to her. Besides she needs it daily, just like how she needs to eat, drink and breathe.
Then she met a man. A fallen rock star that came and swept her off her feet. They loved passionately and loved deeply. She has finally met her Prince, her dream came true. He didn’t mind her occupation and loved her as she is. She couldn’t believe that this was true, that a man loved her enough to not mind her past and even encouraged her to continue as a future.

This section of the book was the most enjoyable, because as any girl, I do too enjoy romance novels. Except that this wasn’t fiction, but actually a true love story. At this point of Tera’s life, she was also facing a major law suit from her agent (they were fleecing her money as a lucrative porn star) and so she became suicidal, violent and depressed. Evan stood by her despite her being a total mental bitch. His love for her was THAT strong, despite having just met.

This kinda made me reflect abit on my own relationships. Although I was with my first boyfriend for 3 years, I never felt he loved me for who I am. I was suppressed, because he was this Asian male chauvinist who is in love with the perfect image, girl-next-door that I was. He walks in front of me, wouldn’t allow me to wear short skirts; and he calls me a slut if I go out with my male friends (not one-on-one, but even in a group). It was very hurtful to have your boyfriend call you that. He loves the fact that I am adventurous and sporty (he loves sports too) but I have to “behave” when in public, i.e speak and sit like a lady. He was attracted to me because I could speak and write well, and thus I should NEVER speak Singlish. Once I did, with an Indian Singaporean Auntie in the Asian Mart in Australia, and he stayed angry with me for the entire night. That was again, very hurtful.

After we broke up, I was casually going out with this other guy. He was a looker, like David Beckham. He often brought me to posh restaurants to wine and dine, everything was swell. Then one evening at Oosh, Dempsey, he brought me to a Japanese restaurant so quiet that you could hear a pin drop. As I got off my chair to visit the loo, my chair scrapped and made a screeching ee ee sound. He looked up from the menu and FROWNED. I though “Oooo K…abit of over-reaction there isn’t it?”

He ordered tiger prawns and they came piping juicy hot. Now, I am NOT a lady. I try to be one, but in my truest state, I AM NOT. I eat pizzas with my hands, I eat chicken wings with my hands and I love eating crabs getting all messy. I will wipe my mouth with my sleeve if I have to, and I will my 鼻塞 and stick it under the table. Ok, JUST KIDDING ABOUT THE LAST TWO.

So anyway, I try being a lady because I know that’s what David Beckham wants to date. So I ate my tiger prawns with a fork and knife. As soon as I try de-shelling, guess what happened? My fork slipped and I shot PRAWN JUICE right smack INTO HIS EYE ACROSS THE TABLE!!! Can I get any more accurate??!!

By then, this is our nth date. It wasn’t our first. You would think we’ll laugh about the incident because he is asking me out repeatedly because he likes my character, and not to get into my pants. He screeched like a girl saying I tried to blind him, the juice was hot. Haha, nah, that didn’t happen. But we did eat the rest of the dinner IN SILENCE.

I knew then, after my first boyfriend that I had to be with someone who will love me for who I am, how I am. This incident further affirmed my thoughts.

Back to Tera and her love story, an except from the couple in love:

He looked me in the eyes and said, “It’s finally just you and me. From the day I met you, I knew it would always be you and me forever. I want to marry you over and over.”

When Evan said it, he meant it! Because in their 5 years of marriage, they got married 4 times. Their theory on getting married over and over again was this: You don’t go to the gym just once and stay fit for life. So, why commit yourself to each other just once in your life? Renewing our vows and recommitting ourselves to each other is like maintenance for our marriage. It’s constant work and needs constant reaffirmations.

It wasn’t only the usual Happy Anniversary dinner, it was the full works. Picking the bride up, walking down the aisle and saying I Do all over again. Talk about Back to the Future.

So from talking about her porn career, the book became a relationship guide! If a porn star, with a warped sense of career can have a successful marriage, why not anyone else?!

The Rules of Their Marriage:

  1. Agree to agree

  2. Let the other live out all of their fantasies on camera and off

  3. Treat each other’s feelings with the utmost care and respect

  4. Never forget that our relationship is about love, friendship, fun, compassion, trust, parternship, and, of course, sex.

  5. When having sex with other people, never forget that it’s just about sex. (applies to porn stars ONLY because it's their job, geddit?)

  6. Tera is number one to Evan and Evan is number one to Tera.

At this point, I smsed my friend.

“Thank you for letting me read the book first! Porn star autobiography turns out to be the GREATEST LOVE STORY of all time. I am hopeful again. I will find love again.”

Men fear commitment because they fear they can't get to live their dreams once they have a wife to consider, a baby to expect, 2 families to care for. I, however, beg to differ. As a partner, i do not believe in holding a man back or pressuring anyone to do anything they didn't want to. Instead, as a partner, you are meant to encourage and support your husband in his dreams and fantasies.

But oops, I haven’t exactly reached the end of the book. They did eventually divorce after 7 years of marriage. Their love story started out simple, it was a boy and a girl deeply in love. Got married and the girl thought that this was the end of her porn career. The boy, her husband that he is, encouraged her and supported her in getting back the household name she created (she is very very famous as a porn star). 


She despite being a “whore”, did not want to have sex with any one else now that she has a husband. So he became her co-star and porn star. They both conquered the adult industry and make shit loads of money. USD 10,000 from one movie, USD 60,000 from a stage show and selling merchandise. All in one day/ night’s of work. The marriage broke down because it came to a point where Tera wants to stop making porn movies but just be a normal housewife and have children (yea yea…and all men roll their eyes and say “women and their maternal instincts”.) but the husband? He didn’t want to. He wanted to continue being a porn star, the career HIS WIFE INTRODUCED HIM TO.
We love and respect each other enough to know that our individual growth and happiness are more important than fighting to stay together to make compromises that either of us just can’t live with. People change. We changed. We have made compromises and sacrifices in our lives and marriage, but we’re at a juncture where the compromises or sacrifices would change who are are and what we want to such a degree that only resentment would result.”

Reading that reminded me of how much sacrifices I made for my first boyfriend. I gave up my friends, because I was always rushing home to cook dinner for him. I gave up holidays, because he’d talk me out of it so I can stay home to cook dinner for him.

I never did regret making those sacrifices though, because I am a traditional girl at heart too. If only he had appreciated and loved me back as much.

I’m excited about the future, the great unknown, but i'm no longer fearful to go it alone. I've lived and experienced some of the best and worst, and i wouldn't change any of it. It made me who i am. It also taught me that it's not over; it's far from over. I don't think it'll ever be over. I'm excited to take on the next adventures.

The bottom line is that i know i can do anything on my own now. I plan to cover my tattoo that says 'Evan's Princess'. A princess is usually a damsel in distress who needs a Prince Charming to sweep in, save her, and make her happy. I needed that at the time, but i'm no damsel in distress anymore. And i will never be someone else's 'princess'. I am the queen of my own domain now, and i feel on top of the world for having discovered that."

Tera built a MULTI-MILLIONAIRE empire just based on her name, her looks and her vagi**. She clearly has the wits too as well. A very concise biography, it even includes Q&A with Tera. A book that i thought would just be thrashy fun turns out to be one about love, motivation and empowerment.


 P.S I hope to marry in Las Vegas when my turn comes. Forget about the exorbitant Chinese wedding dinners! I'd rather spend 1/10 of that, no headache about planning and coordinating and still have a silly crazy fun wedding to remember by (Elvis reading your vows). It's cheesy but it's gonna be just like the movies!

Countdown with Tiger

I will start 2011 with a few firsts.

1) I've never been on a party bus.
2) I've never been to a NYE countdown party
3) I've never been kissed at the strike of midnight of NYE
4) I've never been to 3 parties in one night


Tiger Crystal Presents the Ultimate New Year’s Eve Experience


I will be hopping on the Ultimate NYE Tiger Bus and get the opportunity to experience 3 parties in one night! From The Float@Marina Bay to Clarke Quay to Marina Barrage. Even better is i will be taking my friends from overseas for this! I love playing host, i'm proud of Singapore and its local beer.

Want to join me or bring your own friends for this party bus?

Log on to http://tigercrystal.com.sg or http://facebook.com/tigerbeersingapore to find out how you can win your tickets!

Win a Bella Facial

Advertorial
This might be a plug for Bella, but i have indeed been patronizing Bella since i was 19.
From this at 17

to this at 24

So post your beauty question to me here  and stand to win the experience i get every month on my own expense. I will choose a winner on Christmas day and you will get a free premium facial according to your skin condition (worth $340). Perfect to get good skin for Chinese New Year!

I hope you get hooked because girls just need to pamper themselves every once in awhile!

Sunday, December 19, 2010

The Elves of Royal Caribbean

There were 1,900 holiday-ers on board. And to serve that 1,900, it took 750 staff. All on a massive 70,000 toner ship like Legend of the Seas. Often, we tend to neglect these people who make it happen for us on board. We are more than often; too busy enjoying the food, enjoying the fun, enjoying the clean rooms that we return to.

The service on board Legend of the Seas is immaculate. It’s my first time on a cruise, so I did not know what to expect! With an international crew, you really meet all walks of life and feel like you’ve just travelled around the world.

Elf Trait 1: Your room is mysteriously tidied every single time you step out and back in
Without fail, every morning the butlers will greet you in the walkway. Ready to sweep your room spotless when you leave. In land hotels, the chamber maids tidy up your room just once. On sea, although I spent most of the time exploring the massive ship, I do find myself going back every 4 hours or so. Oh the convenience to return when you need to grab that lipstick because you spot a cutie in the dinning room. Oh the convenience to return when it was chilly in the morning and you had your jacket, but now it’s troublesome to carry around. Oh the convenience when you need to shit after a heavy meal and you can return to do it as long as you want and you don’t have to line toilet paper like a cushion as you would in public toilets.

Elf Trait 2: They know your name without you telling them.

There’re various options to eat at (almost ANY time of the day). There is Windjammers where you get international buffet.
The burger and sandwich bar by the pool, room service (surprise, surprise, it’s provided!) and Romeo & Juliet (fine dining). On board Royal Caribbean, everything is already paid upfront when you make reservations. You don’t need to pay a single penny dinning at any part of the ship (alcohol is chargeable though).

However, dinning at the allocated table in Romeo & Juliet, you’ll be assigned a waiter who will serve you every day of your holiday.
They’ll make food recommendations and entertain you (ok, not all have tricks like this Indonesian waiter who had us rolling with his “dirty jokes”). I was impressed with one of them who actually called me by my first name! I wonder how he knew…

Elf Trait 3: They move at lightning speed.

With a ship as big as Legend of the Seas, it takes me 10 minutes to walk from my room (level 6) to the deck (level 9).

Risovoski, the room service manager from some exotic European country, ensures that room service is served hot from the grill.
Elf Trait 4: Incredibly cute.
 Ah, V, the nice smelling cutie. He is the retail manager whom we met when we checked out the shops. Incredibly personal, telling you what’s nice and what’s not, I spent $300 (!!!) buying duty free Christmas presents (Calvin Klein, DKNY, Shisedio, Johnny Walker and Cognac).
Does the hotel director vaguely resemble Lewis Hamilton too?

Elf Trait 5: Cheerful underground people.
 Feeding 2,650 people and preparing 12,000 meals is no simple feat! This requires 120 cook staff. Everything happens “underground”, the no-access Deck Zero where only incredible food gets served out and up. However, if you purchase the cruise’s cook book, you get the special privilege of discovering all these little men at work.
 A massive kitchen, everything moves fast paced underneath. You wouldn’t imagine that, while you’re slowly strolling away on the upper deck enjoying the sea breeze.
                                               

Home Cruise-made bread! It doesn't get any fresher than this.

On board, the head chef is like a mini celebrity. A girl getting him to autograph her purchased cook book!

Guess what I saw on the menu for the day we disembark?! ABALONE noodles! Aaaaaaaargh!!! Missed it by JUST THIS MUCH.
Elf Trait 6: Friendly and Helpful


Google, my spa therapist from Africa shared with me many juicy gossips that happen on board. She hasn’t been home for the last 9 months! Checking into the spa while the ship was sailing was no mistake! For USD 129, I got a hot stone back massage, a foot massage, a mini facial and a scalp massage. All in 50 minutes. Singaporeans love such deals, bao ka liao (a little bit of everything).

What was different doing it on a cruise, however, is that everything just have that extra special touch. Google did a pre-spa consultation with me, asking if I like it this way or that, assessing my skin and body needs. After treatment, she took a moment to sit down with me, analyzing my skin, telling me what I should avoid or maintain.

Spa customers get to utilize the exclusive sauna and steam bath too.

Meeting Santa
Last but not least, us 10 bloggers got to get an exclusive tour to the helm of the ship.
 On a cruise ship, the Captain is the most respected and has the most authority. Having the best view on board, the captain’s office is a spacious one.
So there you go, all the little men working beneath your deck to make your holiday a memorable one.

Being on Legend of the Seas, it feels like home, it feels like family.