Saturday, January 3, 2009

Guuzen

It definitely was coincidence at all. Or if it is, then it should be great.

When I plan and hope to see him, it ends up a failure. I always see to it to look for his father, because I know well where and what time he arrives. Earnestly, I hope that he tags along, but seriously I know that he's not into going to church as  I do.

There were exactly three noticeable times I saw him looking my way. The first one was during a random Sunday morning, maybe because I stare at him too much. The second one was on a Sunday afternoon Vesper service. I certainly did not recognize him coming our way because I was busy talking. He appeared right before me, sitting just a few inches beside me. We shook hands that day as for the congregational greeting rites. Nothing special, I guess for him. But to me, it was bliss.

The third and last one was just 2 Sundays ago. I didn't know again that he was coming. It's been an awful 5 months that I haven't seen him. Very well then, he was there. And on cue, I looked his way and unbelievably, his gaze was just right on. My way. Definitely. I felt uneasy because I don't feel like I look like someone worth his time gazing. So I looked away, pretended it was nothing.

Occasional glances followed, of course by me. Then the service ended, making me wanna go to the wash room shortly. When I left, he was with his family on the kneeling area. When I returned, my mom told me that I should've stayed. She said that he was certainly looking for me in a way, because he stood still near the pew we were sitting just when they are about to leave. I didn't believe her. I saddened, since I missed the chance to further see him.

Upon my exit to the church. he was standing right in front of me. He was wearing a red, white- striped shirt in that sunny Sunday. I glanced his way and turned right, going to the newsstand. He did look happy while talking to his siblings. I tried to peek again. Then I left. In our car, I tried to see his blurred image through the window one more time. I guess that will be another last time.

Will he be coming this Sunday, tomorrow?

I hope so. :)

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